Green Sheet – 18th July 2021

Cheshire South Circuit – Audlem Mission Area

www.audlemmethodistchurch.org.uk

(Minister: Rev Robin Fox. Tel: 01270 812820 email: minister@audlemmethodistchurch.org.uk)
Newsletter for Audlem, Hankelow & Hatherton Methodist Churches
For the week commencing 18th July 2021

Audlem Methodist Church – Currently closed for refurbishment.

THE ANNUAL CHURCH MEETING 2021 takes place today at 11.30am at the home of Fran and Chris Hughes.

At Hankelow – there will be a service each Sunday at 10.30am

The service today will be led by Nick Cutts.
The service next Sunday is by Own Arrangement and Roger will introduce the service
There is NO service at Hankelow on Sunday 1 August, but there will be a Thanksgiving service at Hatherton at 2.30pm to which some of the congregation will be invited. It is held by invitation only.

• Numbers are limited to 20 so booking a place is essential
• To book, contact either Val Morrey on 01270 811930 or Roger Millns on 07807 402348
• Covid restrictions will apply
• Sunday 25 July service is Own arrangement. Roger will introduce the service

The zoom service continues today at 10.30 am. The next zoom service will be Sunday 1st August.

Amusing items
I asked a librarian if she had "Great Expectations". She replied, 'I used to, but I ended up working in the library.'
I'm planning a holiday in Italy. I'm leaning towards Pisa.
Five out of three people have difficulty understanding fractions.
Aren't train spotters sad? I counted 15 today.
How is it possible to have a civil war?
Me and my mate were walking down the street singing Carpenters' songs when a copper shouted at us to stop disturbing the peace. We'd only just begun.

The Name Game
Vicar, holding a baby beside the font: "Mr and Mrs Royd, are you sure you want to name her Emma?"
And Mr & Mrs Fish: "You're sure about Courtney?"
When my wife was giving birth to our daughter the midwide asked, "What about epidural anaesthesia"? I said, "We've already picked names, thanks."
When I was a kid I was adopted by a man whose nickname was Daz. He's my non-biological father.
Lance is a pretty unusual name these days, but back in medieval times people were named Lance a lot.
I was called 'pretty' today! Well, actually, the full statement was 'You're pretty annoying', but I only focus on positive things.

The next newsletter will be Sunday 1 August. Please send any items for the newsletter to Janet Furber email: r.furber@btinternet.com or telephone 01270 811598 by 5pm on Fridays.

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